The aches of love

Rain pelts down, drenching pavement, pooling grass
inviting a certain cozy warmth heightening desire to hold hot coffee
mug between palms, snuggling up
suddenly the contentedness is replaced with chaos
the atmosphere changes
faces worried, scattered, anxious
there is an urgency
hearts drop as needs are communicated
troubling situations made known
responses come together
level of calmness must manifest as to settle others
eyes full of searching, gentle words bringing tears
hugs that sink in weakness
shattered worth of another
exhaustion defeating
pain, hurt, trauma coloring the moment
struggle aches each one who loves

Surreal survivors

Frayed, ripped jeans, knees clutched with arms to body

sitting, nearly being swallowed by hat and coat as she shivers

I ask to sit, barley hearing voice as it's spoken just above a whisper

 sweet, innocent face intently peering at mine as we speak

I learn her story as she shares carefully

 articulating very slowly, leading me to hang on her every word

with each sentence her chin quavers, allowing herself a fully honest moment

 to tear up and be openly sad

we sit together in the sad, in the alone feeling

for a heavy moment I get to experience life through her eyes

I see the boots and knees of those walking back and forth

I feel the isolation, an awareness of being invisible

depending on loose change and pity of the stranger

knowing a little bed in the dark alleyway awaits

uncertain of when life will begin to get better

:::

With eyes to glowing stones below our feet

we trek into the pitch darkness of the overpass

flashlight in hand calling out into the echo of spray painted concrete

Beholding our friends homes

gathered, collected,set up amongst the messy trash

Out of the stillness two heads pop up from a mattress

sleepy faces, big smiles, kind chatter

sitting up in bed ready to share a box of pizza

Those sweet and savory moments

Oh that sweetness of sharing a little round table with him

paint brushes in hand

little mugs of coffee

creating beauty across from one another.

Arms a smattering of tattoos

voice of honesty

heart soft and humble

eyes wet with tears,

such strength and endurance to survive.

Savor.

Crisp fall wind

her beauty

clutching a plastic bag of bread

ready to feed the birds.

Bundled up

tiny legs crossed in her wheelchair

open arms ready to hug and kiss my cheek

carrying warmth

Savor.

Eyes crinkled at the edges in sweet gazes

sharing joy sparking life

glances of endearment

thick stew.

Words softening hearts

hugs awakening love

sighs speaking of identity

Jesus chats over acrylics 

Savor.

Heads tilted together in giddy laughter

affection spoken in darling phrases

banter

teatimes

sitting in crowds hearing her story

bright smile hemming and hawing bashfully

 Savor.

I am learning to savor the sweet moments in life

My thoughts cloud, rush and worry envelopes, and these pieces of sweet are lost.

My heart becomes weary, my mind overwhelmed, I lose thankful attentiveness.

The gifts are missed, the joys, the tiny details of his lavish love overlooked. 

I am learning to find Jesus presence in the simplicity of the moments, in the here and now.

I am learning to see his image, his heart right in front of me.  

I am learning to be okay with the mystery of it all, to just soak it up and enjoy.